Archer on FX. He's the man with the plan. Well, maybe not the ENTIRE plan, but he gets the job done. Image from http://www.fxnetworks.com/shows/originals/archer/download.php.

Smooth.  Suave.  Debonaire.  Intelligent.  Cunning.  Handsome.  Well-dressed.

Well, at least one of those adjectives describes Archer on FX, our latest ESM Icon.

According to the official Archer on FX website:

Rakish and reckless, suave and sarcastic, Sterling Archer (Codename: Duchess) is the world’s greatest secret agent.

According to Sterling Archer.

Archer’s colleagues at ISIS – including his boss, Malory, who is also his mother; his partner, Lana, who is also his ex-girlfriend; and every other person in the building, to whom he’s just usually a colossal tool – would probably describe him in less flattering terms.

Like colossal tool, for example.

But after meeting Archer’s mother, it’s hard to blame him for not always being the easiest person to get along with. That person would probably be Woodhouse, Archer’s ancient valet (to whom Archer is, constantly and without fail, a colossal tool).

Women just swoon for him, though. But that might just be due to his luxuriously thick head of hair, his steely blue eyes, or abs you could wash your laundry on if only he would let you.

Which he probably wouldn’t: it would seem too much like work to him

So why did we chose Archer as our next icon?  Simply check out these clips on “What would Archer do?” from Archer on FX and you’ll see why:

On office romance:

On fashion advice:

On picking up the ladies:

On budgeting:

On new year’s eve:

Ok, well maybe Archer isn’t exactly the most politically correct super spy in the world, but he’s got a ton of style.

And that’s why we love him.

For more information about Archer on FX, you can check out his official site at http://www.fxnetworks.com/shows/originals/archer/.

You can also check out more video clips on Archer on FX’s official YouTube page at http://www.youtube.com/user/FXArcher#p/a.

Boom. We're hooked on Cinemax's original series Strike Back. Image from http://www.cinemax.com/strike-back/.

We are officially hooked on Strike Back, the original anti-terrorist badass series on Cinemax.

From the official Strike Back website:

A high-octane, globe-spanning thriller with storylines ripped from today’s headlines, Strike Back, Cinemax’s first scripted prime-time original drama series, focuses on two members of a top-secret intelligence agency known as Section 20: Michael Stonebridge, a British sergeant on the elite counter-terrorism team, and Damien Scott, a former U.S. Delta Force operative who was discharged on the eve of the U.S. invasion of Iraq. Stonebridge, Scott and the rest of Section 20 criss-cross the globe on the trail of a deadly international terrorist named Latif, who is planning a major attack involving a cache of WMD that could have global repercussions.

If you’ve been looking for a show that mixes in guns, explosions, dudes killing terrorists, beautiful women who get naked more often than necessary and two badasses that are almost to par with Mr. Chuck Norris himself, Strike Back is definitely the show for you.

Strike Back's two resident badasses, Michael Stonebridge and Damien Scott. Image from http://www.cinemax.com/strike-back/.

The two most recent episodes we watched are the ones that got us hooked:

• 5 EU officials in Kosovo get kidnapped by the biggest heroine trafficker in the area and requests the freedom of his cousin (who also happens to be a terrorist) in exchange for the hostages
• The two main characters are asked to deliver the cousin terrorist and en-route to the airport, the transport vehicle is blown up by other terrorists who kill themselves with cyanide pills because they were chased down by the main characters (luckily, they put the cousin terrorist in the trunk of the car).
• Once there, the two main characters decide to not do the exchange because they felt they were going to get killed if they followed the plan.  They decide to kill all the terrorists at the exchange.  The odds are 15 terrorists with automatic weapons to the 2 main dudes.  They kill them all anyway.
• They run out of gas.
• They have to find another vehicle to transport their rescued hostages.  To do that, they have to invade a heavily fortified heroine processing plant.  They kill everyone, but the vehicle they intended to commandeer explodes in flames.
• A team from the American military finds them and brings them back to their base.  Unfortunately, the American team’s leader is corrupt and in the back pocket of the aforementioned heroine dealer and the main characters are betrayed.
• Women are sent to be drugged up on heroine and sold as sex slaves.
• Lead characters are sent to another location to be killed, but escape from their transport vehicle because another American hid a firearm in the head of a decapitated victim and throws it into the transport with them.
• They go back and rescue hostages by killing everyone in the prison.
• As they are escaping and en route to save the women about to become sex slaves, a military team catches up with them in a standoff.  One lead character escapes because the other lead character stays and covers them.
• Lead character that stays is presumed dead.
• Other lead character and freed hostages try to find and save women about to become sex slaves.
• They find themselves in a mine field and one hostage gets blown up by a mine because he goes temporarily insane from all the stress.
• They find where the women are found, remaining lead character goes into another heavily fortified enemy area and single-handedly kills the rest of the terrorists who are hand-picking their sex-slaves.
• Lead character finds other presumed dead lead character who was actually alive, badly wounded and brought back to a room where they are dissecting war victims and harvesting their organs.
• Presumed dead lead character frees himself and is picked up by other lead character with all hostages in tow.

Just writing about the two-episode plot is ridiculous.  You have to watch this show.

For more information about Strike Back, the ESM-approved original series on Cinemax, you can check out their official site at http://www.cinemax.com/strike-back/.

Jim Caviezel as John Reese, former CIA super spy on the CBS TV show, Person of Interest. Images from http://www.cbs.com/shows/person_of_interest/

Sometimes being a former CIA Agent has its advantages.

You get to travel the world, get the best covert operation experience and you get to kick ass and take names.  Unfortunately, you’re just not as highbrow as your MI-6 counterparts.

If you watched the most recent episode, you'll know John Reese isn't his real name. Image from http://www.cbs.com/shows/person_of_interest.

For John Reese in the CBS tv show, Person of Interest, being a (presumed dead) former-CIA agent has its advantages because it allowed him to team up with reclusive and (also presumed dead) billionaire Mr. Finch to stop violent crimes before they happen.

According to the official Person of Interest website:

PERSON OF INTEREST stars Jim Caviezel, Emmy Award winner Michael Emerson and Academy Award nominee Taraji P. Henson in a crime thriller about a presumed dead former-CIA agent, Reese, who teams up with a mysterious billionaire, Finch, to prevent violent crimes by using their own brand of vigilante justice. Reese’s special training in covert operations appeals to Finch, a software genius who invented a program that uses pattern recognition to identify people about to be involved in violent crimes. Using state-of-the-art surveillance technology, the two work outside of the law, using Reese’s adept skills and Finch’s unlimited wealth to unravel the mystery of the “person of interest” and stop the crime before it happens. Reese’s actions draw the attention of the NYPD, including homicide detective Carter, and Fusco, a cop whom Reese uses to his advantage. With infinite crimes to investigate, Reese and Finch find that the right person, with the right information, at the right time, can change everything.

So what makes John Reese a great candidate for this week’s ESM Icon?

He’s a dude in a nice suit that can kill a team of trained assassins with his bare hands.

Need a better reason?

For more information about John Reese and the CBS show Person of Interest, you can check out their official site at http://www.cbs.com/shows/person_of_interest.

Harvey Specter, played by Gabriel Macht on USA's Suits. Image from http://www.usanetwork.com/series/suits/theshow/characterprofiles/specter/gallery/#h01.jpg.

Gabriel Macht plays the cool-as-ice, well-dressed, hotshot lawyer Harvey Specter on USA Network’s show Suits.

I mean, with that sentence alone, it’s very clear why we chose Harvey Specter as our next ESM Icon.

For fans of the show, they know that Harvey Specter is portrayed as the best lawyer in New York who wins all his cases and he makes all the ladies (sans his assistant of course) swoon.

Oh and did we mention he was also a college hoops star?

According the USA Network’s official Suits website:

How do you become New York City’s best closer? You don’t play by the rules.

Harvey Specter has built a career and reputation by breaking the rules. Whether it’s picking up cocktail waitresses, inspiring witnesses or bullying CEOs, Harvey’s shoot-from-the-hip style has made him an effective lawyer and a slick character.

But has Harvey forgotten why he got into law? Hiring Mike Ross as his associate might have been his best decision yet. With Mike taking on the low-profile pro bono cases, Harvey will rediscover what makes justice so sweet.

So who preytell is Mike Ross?  He’s the main character of the show, who has a photographic memory, no law degree and is hired by Harvey Specter (blah-diditty-blah-blah).

He doesn’t dress really well, isn’t very refined and is obviously a newbie associate, so…. you can watch the show to get all the details about Mike Ross.

We’d rather focus on the badassness that is Harvey Specter.  According to Suits’ Wiki page:

Gabriel Macht as Harvey Specter: New York’s best closer, a senior partner at Pearson Harden, and former ADA in the New York County District Attorney’s Office. He is revealed to have graduated fifth in his class at Harvard Law, despite Jessica’s statement that “while there, you screwed around”. He dislikes taking on pro bono cases. He is from Chicago.

I think Wikipedia forgot one small detail in Harvey Specter’s character profile – his suit game is tight.

Oh and did we mention Gabriel Macht played Stackhouse in Behind Enemy Lines (the main pilot that got shot in the beginning of the movie)?

Yeah – plus 5 points for this ESM Icon. And plus 10 points for you if you were aware of that little factoid ahead of time.

For more information about Suits, Harvey Specter and Gabriel Macht, you can check out the official USA Network Suits website at http://www.usanetwork.com/series/suits/index.html.

Barney Stinson, from How I Met Your Mother on CBS, lives by the same code of awesome that ESM lives by. Image from http://brocrastinator.com/barney-stinson-bro-code.

For those familiar with the CBS show How I met your mother, you’re probably wondering why it took us so long before we recognized Barney Stinson as an ESM Icon.

For those that aren’t familiar with the show, these three paragraphs from his Wiki entry describe him best:

Barney is very well-connected; the most affluent member of the group. He frequently buys expensive items—such as a last-minute plane ticket to San Francisco, thousands of dollars in postage stamps, or two televisions specifically for smashing in frustration—in the spur of the moment. He is also something of a metrosexual; he waxes his chest, enjoys manicures and has an extensive knowledge of designer labels and gourmet food. However, he is also seen to have a gambling problem that he occasionally gets under control, only to relapse as seen in several episodes such as “Atlantic City”, where he has Chinese Triad gambling friends, and “Monday Night Football”.

As far as talent goes, Barney has exhibited eloquence, wit and creativity numerous times throughout the series. He speaks several languages, using what is said to be Ukrainian (actually Russian) with his tailor, Mandarin, and Korean at least twice in business deals with shady North Koreans. He apparently also has above-average video-editing skills; he created and edited his entire video resume all by himself. He seems to be a talented website designer, as shown in “The Playbook”. As shown on more than one occasion, he is proficient at playing the piano, as are Ted and Marshall. He seems to have a thorough understanding of human behavior and uses this mainly to manipulate situations to his advantage (mostly to pick up women). Several episodes also showcase many of Barney’s crazier abilities, such as his physical ability to complete the New York City marathon without a single day of training (although this seems to be through sheer willpower rather than physical strength, as his legs went numb while he took the subway moments later), being able to punch through walls, stay under water for up to 12 minutes and being knowledgeable enough to guess the exact price of prizes on The Price Is Right. He also juggles knives in “Doppelgangers”. Despite his eclectic and prodigious talents, Barney is lacking in several common skills, such as driving a car or using a screwdriver, although he seems to have learned the former, as he tries to prove that he can get out of a speeding ticket. In “Robin 101″, Barney stated that he was diagnosed with ADHD as a child, probably explaining his habit of zoning out when people are talking to him.

Although The Early Show described him as “utterly devoid of morality”, Barney lives by the “Bro Code”, his own code of rules.Despite his overall questionable character, according to creator Craig Thomas, Barney is “a pretty fragile character who’s really afraid of being alone. He just wants people to like him, to be important to people, and to have disciples who follow his word.” He has displayed acts of kindness on multiple occasions, such as reuniting Lily and Marshall and preventing Marshall from sleeping with other women. Although coming across as a very strong character with a penchant for committing daring and wild feats, Barney has an extreme fear of spiders, as shown in the season 2 episode “First Time in New York”. He also has a habit of eating ice cream when he’s upset, although this is common among all the main cast.

Aside from the fact he doesn’t drive (he lives in New York, so that’s okay), he is the ultimate ESM child-spawn, especially since he follows the Bro Code.

Barney Stinson trying to win over Nora in How I met your mother on CBS. Image from http://www.cbs.com/shows/how_i_met_your_mother/photos/66848/season-7-episode-4/66840.

Some of the greatest golden rules from the Bro Code are:

Article 9:
If you go to the bar with your buddies, you must buy a round of drinks at least once. The Bro with the better paying job is required to buy the first round. If the other Bro is temporarily out of money or left his wallet at home drinks can be lended yet in the long run these drinks must be repaid, later that night by wingman services or any other act of entertainment or at the next gathering.

Article 21:
In a 6 person hot tub, there should be a maximum of 3 guys.

Article 23:
A Bro should not watch Oxygen, Womens Entertainment, or Lifetime.

Article 43:
A Bro should not wear crocs.

So true, Mr. Stinson.  So true.

Additionally, not only do we think Barney Stinson is ESM Icon material, we would also invite him to the ultimate ESM Icon Legends Party, along with Jack Donoughy, The Most Interesting Man in the World and Arthur (2011).

Of course, we would have the party in a Las Vegas nightclub. Just because.

Trust us, if that party ever happened, all the attendees may not make it home… ever.

It would, however, be the best 72 hours of our lives.

For more information about Barney Stinson and the CBS Show How I met your mother, you can check out their official site at http://www.cbs.com/shows/how_i_met_your_mother/.

You can also follow Barney Stinson’s blog at http://www.cbs.com/primetime/how_i_met_your_mother/community/barney_blog/index.php.

Derek Zoolander on Saturday Night Live. Welcome back Derek, welcome back. Image from http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/weekend-update-stefon-and-zoolander/1361094.

After a long hiatus, Derek Zoolander has finally made it back into the spotlight on last week’s Saturday Night Live.

He dropped lyrical sonnets like:

The Derek Zoolander Foundation for fat kids who are fat but not in a cute way like that fat kid in Modern Family

and

For too long, Halloween in New York has been a quiet and almost religiony holiday for old people and babies.

as well as

I want to send a message that you don’t need illegal drugs to have a good time.  There are plenty of good prescription drugs.

So true Derek.  So true.

You can check out the entire video here:

For more information about the Zoolander SNL skit, you can check out the main NBC.com website at http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/weekend-update-stefon-and-zoolander/1361094.

We’ve all accidentally praised Rudolph Hitler on TV, ok? – where do they come up with this stuff?

Whatever the case, we at ESM are glad to see Zoolander back in the limelight once again.

If you want inspiration, you should check out Oprah Presents Master Class on OWN. Image from Oprah.com.

If you are a regular reader of our magazine, you are probably a lot like us;  You’re constantly looking for sources of inspiration on a regular basis.

And trust us, nothing will inspire you more than Oprah Presents Master Class, the latest show from the Oprah Winfrey Network.

The most recent show we caught was based on Simon Cowell, most commonly known as the creator of a little known show called American Idol.  It gives you a lot of insight on what it takes to… well, be Simon Cowell.

Apparently it just takes a lot of listening.

And big balls, luck, a good ear for talent, timing and a great team.

For more information about Oprah Presents Master Class, you can check out their official site on oprah.com.

Janet Montgomery. Dirty. Image from harrypottering.com.

Of course as I am writing this, I am watching the most recent episode of Human Target on FOX where the writers figure out a storyline in which Janet Montgomery has strip down to her underwear and cover herself in oil for a heist.

Brilliant.

Janet Montgomery and a peacock. Image from poptower.com.

Maybe she stays on the show, maybe she doesn’t.  In either case it is another good reason to watch Human Target.

Janet Montgomery is the hot one on the left (without the beard). Image from neogaf.com.

Here is an excerpt from her Wiki entry:

Montgomery began her acting career at the age of 12, when she appeared on British children show Short Change, with her brother Jason. In 2008, she was cast as the love interest of Nicholas Hoult in an episode of the teen drama Skins. Montgomery appeared in both the critically acclaimed Dis/Connect and short film Flushed. After a few years of living in London, she moved to Los Angeles so she could chase the dreams she had as a child.

In September 2008, it was announced Montgomery had signed on to portray the role of Serina in Dark Castle Entertainment’s Slasher Horror film The Hills Run Red. Filming took place towards the star of 2009 in Sofia, Bulgaria. The film stars Sophie Monk and Tad Hilgenbrink. The film premiered at Horror film festival UK Frightfest. The film was released Straight-to-DVD on 29 September 2009. Despite Montgomery’s performance being well received, critical reception was negative.

In April 2008, Montgomery announced she had signed on to portray the role of Alex, the leading female character of Wrong Turn 3: Left for Dead. The film is the third instalment of the Cannibal Horror trilogy series Wrong Turn. Filming took place in Sofia, Bulgaria on 4 August 2008. Filming ended on 4 September 2008. The film was announced completed in January 2009. The film was released Straight-to-DVD on 20 October 2009 via Fox Home Entertainment. Critical reception was negative to mixed.

Don’t worry boys – all of her movies aren’t B slasher flicks.  She’s set to be in the psychological thriller Black Swan with Natlie Portman.  You also know she is a regular in the Fox TV show Human Target.

The Super Samurai from History Channel's latest show: Stan Lee's Superhumans.

If someone were to tell you they could cut a baseball in half with a samurai sword as a major league pitcher was pitching it at him, would you believe them?

Better yet, what if that same person were to tell you they could cut a bb in half from a bb gun 400 feet away?

Well, believe it by checking out this amazing video: http://www.history.com/shows/stan-lees-superhumans/videos/super-samurai#super-samurai

Who would have thought that Stan Lee would be able to find some real life superheroes?  For more information about Stan Lee’s Superhumans TV show, you can visit the History Channel’s official website online.

Amazing how they made her still look sexy in this outfit. Image from nbc.com/undercovers.

As a reader of ESM, you’re probably thinking we’re suckers for any TV show that has spys in it.

You are right.  We are suckers for any TV show that has spys in it, especially NBC shows that are produced by J.J. Abrams titled Undercovers.

Say "sexpionage" again. Image from nbc.com/undercovers.

In the show, the main female lead (Samanta Bloom) is played by Gugu Mbatha-Raw.  At the beginning of the pilot episode, she plays a typical housewife but as the show progresses, viewers eventually find out she is a super-hot spy with looks, skills and a body that should only be used with a license from the government.

Here is a little excerpt from the show’s official website:

Outwardly, Steven Bloom (Boris Kodjoe, “Tyler Perry’s Madea’s Family Vacation,” “Soul Food,” “Resident Evil: Afterlife”) and his wife, Samantha (Gugu Mbatha-Raw, “Dr. Who,” “Bonekickers”), are a typical married couple who own and operate a small catering company in Los Angeles – with help from Samantha’s easily frazzled handful of a sister, Lizzy (Mekia Cox, “90210,” “This Is It”). Secretly, the duo were two of the best spies the CIA had ever known, until they fell in love on the job five years ago and retired.

And she is now holding a gun. Image from nbc.com/undercovers.

When fellow spy and good friend Leo Nash (Carter MacIntyre, “American Heiress,” “Nip/Tuck”) goes missing while on the trail of a Russian arms dealer, the Blooms are reinstated by boss and agency liaison, Carlton Shaw (Gerald McRaney, “Deadwood,” “Jericho”), to locate and rescue Nash.

With assistance from resourceful CIA field agent Bill Hoyt (Ben Schwartz, “Parks and Recreation,” “Bronx World Travelers”), whose professional admiration for Steven isn’t hard to miss, the pair is thrust back into the world of espionage, disguises and hand-to-hand combat.

No she isn't smiling at you, sorry. Image from nbc.com/undercovers.

Is there a “Classic TV” article in the making for the Undercovers TV show?  Maybe.  We’re just going to have to watch a few more shows before we make a decision first.

For more information about Samantha Bloom and Undercovers, you can visit the show’s official website.

Aly Michalka is the hot one. Ok, the hot blonde one.

Ever heard of Aly and AJ?  Probably not, unless you are between the ages of 14-16, a female or are a parent of child who have heard of them.

Question #2 – have you seen the big ads all over malls with the super hot cheerleaders on them?

Ding.  You know who Aly Michalka is.

Aly Michalka. Cheering her way into your room. Through the TV. Image from hellcatsfans.com.

Here’s a little excerpt from her Wiki entry:

Michalka’s acting debut came when she was cast in the role of Keely Teslow on the Disney Channel Original Series, Phil of the Future. She has also starred in the Disney Channel Original Movies Now You See It…, in which she plays Allyson Miller, an ambitious television producer, and Cow Belles, in which she appears opposite her sister. She announced via her MySpace that she had booked a leading role in the Walden Media film Bandslam, about a group of misfits who form a rock band. She co-starred with Vanessa Hudgens and the movie was released in August 2009. Her sister Amanda is featured in the Peter Jackson film The Lovely Bones. Michalka and her sister comprise the musical duo 78violet, and released their first album, Into the Rush, on August 16, 2005. The next year, they brought out a holiday album in September, covering 9 tracks, along with two originals, titled Acoustic Hearts of Winter. In July 2007, their album, Insomniatic, hit stores, featuring the American top 20 hit single, “Potential Breakup Song”. The two were working on a new album, to be released in the early 2010. The release date has been postponed after they left their label.

Guess what? She sings too.

Want to see more of Aly?  Check out her new show on the CW called Hellcats.  You can view more information about the new show online here.

Imagine the horrible tanlines this bathing suit gives. I'm sure that's what you are imagining. Image from nitelinemagazine.com.

We claimed it a while back when we declared Maggie Q as an ESM Dime Piece.  Now, we are glad to hear Maggie Q got her own show named Nikita (we’d like to think we had something to do with it). 

For anyone that has seen the show, you know it is an action-packed melee of awesomeness with hotness to boot.

Here’s a little excerpt from the official CW website:

When she was a deeply troubled teenager, Nikita (Maggie Q, “Live Free or Die Hard,” “Mission Impossible 3″) was rescued from death row by a secret U.S. agency known only as Division, who faked her execution and told her she was being given a second chance to start a new life and serve her country. What they didn’t tell her was that she was being trained as a spy and assassin. Throughout her grueling training at Division, Nikita never lost her humanity, even falling in love with a civilian. When her fiancé was murdered, Nikita realized she had been betrayed and her dreams shattered by the only people she thought she could trust, so she did what no one else before her had been able to do: she escaped. Now, after three years in hiding, Nikita is seeking retribution and making it clear to her former bosses that she will stop at nothing to expose and destroy their covert operation.

She looks so hot holding that gun. Image from shessmart.com.

But don’t take our word for it, check out the next episode on the CW and get ready to fall in love with Nikita, especially when she is shooting a long range 50 caliber rifle with a thermoscope.  Soooo hoooot.

For more information, you can visit the official Nikita TV Show website on the CW.