The Oscars. Rated NC-17.

The Oscars.  Another awards ceremony that you don’t really want to watch but do anyway.  To make things more interesting in our lives, we decided over a few shots of tequila what movie titles can actually double as porn titles.

Really.

The Blind Side
A romantic story about a janitor who inexplicably has an affair with the football coach.  In the dark.

An Education
An amazing journey of growth and youth set in downtown Riverside Junior College.  They both laughed, loved and loved.  And loved. And loved. And… loved. 

The Hurt Locker
The story of a mythical sex move that only a few have learned to master without killing their partner.  Think Blades of Glory meets Cirque du Soleil.

Inglorious Basterds
Set in World War II, these young Jewish-American soldiers stormed more than Normandy.

Precious: Based on the Novel ‘Push’ by Sapphire
An eclectic collection of short stories about the dog from Silence of the Lambs set in the Sapphire nightclub in Las Vegas, Nevada.

Up in the Air
Really?  You need a synopsis for this one?

Fantastic Mr. Fox
The story of an older divorcee with a “furries” fetish.  He’s fantastic.

Princess and the Frog
The princess on the search for the ultimate Frog – the next evolution of the Rabbit.

Nine
The story of a man who wants to use all nine.  Inches.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
A coming of age story when Harry Potter meets the virgin Prince.

That’s right, we went there and we don’t care.  Not only does this article have no relevance to our core purpose as a business, it has no intellectual value.

We wrote it just because we could.