You wish. This isn't the mistress we're talking about. Image courtesy of iStockphoto/Thinkstock.

If you have a girlfriend, or fiancee, or if you’re lucky enough to have found “the One” and made her your wife, I suggest getting a mistress.  Now, your mistress may not be all that to look at, but maybe she performs amazingly.  Perhaps she is just around on the weekends.  Maybe you met in high school and you are just now getting down to business.

My mistress is music.  I love it.  I have enough equipment to pretend that I’m a big shot producer.

If you ever had a dream that just didn’t quite manifest, or you found something that you really loved and it ended up taking a backseat to that thing called life, I’d say get after it.  Join a basketball league.  Get an old car and fix her up.  Dust off that old guitar, or go buy your first guitar, and channel that inner Jimi Hendrix.

Your mistress can be a great outlet if it means getting in shape to compete, or forgetting about the World for a minute while you play a round of golf.  It also keeps you from becoming a spectator and watching all of the extremely interesting train wrecks on tv known as “reality” television.  It doesn’t matter how old you are, or finances, or time… do what you can, and have fun with it.


Richard has been in the Essential Style for Men mix since its inception in 2009.

When he isn’t busy serving as the ESM’s Director of Fashion & Style, you may find him on the beach playing volleyball, or working hard in Thailand shooting with a beautiful Brazilian supermodel.