Yarrr, the shaving pirate of Penzance. Image courtesy of iStockphoto/Thinkstock.

Almost there, boys. We’ve dealt with the body hair, and the eyebrows are looking sharp. What else is left? Let me tell you. There’s ear hair, nose hair, and the beard/mustache area. Let’s tighten it up.

I was getting my haircut a while back, and my hairstylist pointed out that I had a straggler on my ear! Ohhh, really? Yeah. No more Mr. Nice Grooming Guy. Pluck that sucker. If you’ve got one or two, and a spotter (wife, girlfriend, hairstylist) that can look out for you, then plucking is right on. If you’ve got what looks like a pelt, then you need to hit up the waxing place. Don’t worry, it doesn’t hurt that badly. Or so I’ve been told. Man up!

From the ear it’s a short little jaunt down to the nose. Your issue may be hair on the nose, in the nose, or the combo pack. Again, if you just have a small one or two on the outside, pluck. If you are furry, wax. It should last a while. Inside the nose? Get yourself some tweezerman facial hair scissors or step it up with the deluxe trimmer. Flare your nostrils, wrinkle your nose up, and clean it up for God’s sake, MAN! Be careful with those scissors. The skin on the inside of your nose is very delicate, I learned the hard way. If you don’t have a steady hair sniper hand, then buck up and get the trimmer. Your nose will thank me later.

Last, but certainly not least, we get to the beard and mustache area. We all know how to shave, but I will dispense some gems that I have learned from other folks that know aesthetics. If you use an electric, good on ya. They are easy enough to use every day, and there is not too much to tell you. Just take a close look to make sure you don’t have a trouble spot that is harder to get to that you always miss. If you use a blade, change the blade frequently. Shower BEFORE you shave, and while the hair is still wet, use a healthy amount of shaving cream. My favorite is Aveeno. It is so mild that my face doesn’t feel any burn whatsoever. If you need to shave with a blade multiple days in a row, use shaving cream the first day, then lather your 5 o’clock shadow on subsequent days with a mild soap. Shave in the direction of the hair, and then to get really close, shave in the opposite direction.

That’s it, chaps! Hope you got something out of this, even if it’s just a laugh.


Richard has been in the Essential Style for Men mix since its inception in 2009. When he isn’t busy serving as the ESM’s Director of Fashion & Style, you may find him on the beach playing volleyball, or working hard in Thailand shooting with a beautiful Brazilian supermodel.