Aside from my James Bond handbook, I also like to quote certain movies in daily life.  One of those movies I often quote from is Gladiator, starring Russel Crowe.  It’s a little movie about a Roman General whose family gets slain because Ceasar (the leader of the Roman empire) wanted him to take leadership instead of Ceasar’s son.  (But why am I recapping a movie that you should already know about?)

Below are the quotes (in italics) and some different situations when to use them.

Are you not entertained?!?!

Maximus: [after swiftly dispatching another gladiator] Are you not entertained? Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here?

  • When you are at a bar with your friends doing more shots than anyone else
  • When you score a point while playing sports
  • When you do something embarrasing
I would love to have this helmet to wear to work

I would love to have this helmet to wear at work

Maximus: [removes helmet and turns around to face Commodus] My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.

  • Any time someone asks the perennial question, “who is this guy?”
  • Right before you get ready to kick someone’s ass literally or in sports
  • When getting yourself mentally prepared for a big meeting

 Maximus: Marcus Aurelius had a dream that was Rome, Proximo. That is not it. That is not it!
Proximo: Marcus Aurelius is dead, Maximus. We mortals are but shadows and dust. Shadows and dust, Maximus!

  • When you are disappointed about something, such as losing a job or losing a game
  • When you didn’t get what you wanted, such as fish instead of steak

Commodus: AM I NOT MERCIFUL?

  • When you give someone a few car lengths for a 1/4 mile race
  • When you let someone end the game early after ridiculously beating them in a sport
  • When you slap someone instead of punching them

Marcus Aurelius: Tell me again, Maximus, why are we here?
Maximus: For the glory of the Empire, sire.

  • Right before a big game
  • Right before going out with your friends
  • Just as you are going into a strip joint
Ready for Battle

Ready for Battle

Maximus: Three weeks from now, I will be harvesting my crops. Imagine where you will be, and it will be so. Hold the line! Stay with me! If you find yourself alone, riding in the green fields with the sun on your face, do not be troubled. For you are in Elysium, and you’re already dead!
[Cavalry laughs]
Maximus: Brothers, what we do in life… echoes in eternity.

  • When you are about to do something you don’t want to do in the office, such as firing someone
  • Right before game time
  • For your first night in Vegas 
Strength and Honor

Strength and Honor

Maximus: Strength and honor.

  •  When you see your good friends (the ones who would jump into a fight for you)
A tired gladiator

A tired gladiator

Marcus Aurelius: When was the last time you were home?
Maximus: Two years, two hundred and sixty-four days and this morning.

  • Whenever someone asks how long it has been since you’ve done anything
ESM

To create Essential Style for Men, mix 2 parts petrol, 1 part secret agent, 1 part rock and roll, 1 part hip-hop and a shot of tequila in a shaker with ice and vigorously shake for 20 seconds. Pour into a martini glass rimmed with explosives and have a supermodel serve for all your friends to enjoy.