Hang on boys, this is a "bathing suits optional" party. Image courtesy of Adam Pretty/Lifesize/Thinkstock.

Dressing appropriately – it’s a skill that takes a lot of time, practice and experience to get it right.   So how do you, as a style dumbass, get the chops to know what to wear at the appropriate time? 

It’s simple:

  • Just ask someone else who is familiar with the event or venue
  • Play it safe and be a little more dressed than you need to be
  • Make sure you know your geography
  • Check the weather

The last two are pretty simple things that most people don’t think of.  Have you ever been to a wedding in Miami in the middle of July?  You might as well be wearing speedos up in that mug because it is going to be hot as hell.

Actually, for a day wedding in Miami, you’re probably going to want to rock a light colored linen suit.  Tie is optional (check below).

So the next time you get invited to a house party in Miami for that Columbian drug lord, you’ll know what to wear.  Just make sure you wear comfortable shoes for when the party gets raided by the Feds.


To create Essential Style for Men, mix 2 parts petrol, 1 part secret agent, 1 part rock and roll, 1 part hip-hop and a shot of tequila in a shaker with ice and vigorously shake for 20 seconds. Pour into a martini glass rimmed with explosives and have a supermodel serve for all your friends to enjoy.